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How Christianity Sustains A Gay Man
by J. H. Hayes
Release Date: 02/29/16
Genre: Biography & Autobiography
Pages: 63
Publisher: Club Lighthouse Publishing
Format ISBN Price
E-Book 978-1-77217-041-2 2.99
Author Page: J. H. Hayes
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Summary Excerpt Comments

The story of my life is testament to enduring love and the strength of those who shared it with me. Raised by loving parents in a Southern Baptist home near Houston, I relate personal struggles with acceptance, drugs, activism and spirituality. The book reveals how my Christian Faith prevails over guilt-ridden religion. "Out" in 1980 at age 23, by 1993 I was an AIDS and Civil Rights activist. My Mother’s journey elevates our triumphant story and documents the path to assimilation. She was a hard-core Baptist who grew to accept, understand and love me through Faith.

The book is arranged chronologically detailing influential events. I discuss family, including my older brother who acquired Polio and helped me learn compassion. My Grandfather was a role model through his actions. My parents were wonderful, loving people. All the elements of my future were in place by the time I was 10, and I had a terrific childhood before sex arrived to complicate everything.

The span of Intermediate School through High School expresses the sexuality struggle. I mildly document my first infatuation with a boy in gym class, which might dismiss a skeptic’s view about sexuality being a choice. “My chemical attraction match was lit for life. The die was cast. My standards were set. From that point on, I knew exactly what I was physically attracted to: a Vince who aged simultaneously with me. My romanticism has always been based upon what might have been if we were allowed to mature together.” I become mischievous as tension mounts and I struggle with Baptist guilt. I become popular only to leave it behind when I attend High School where I do not know anyone. Music remained a comfort and inspiration: “The Concert for Bangladesh” was the seed that later matured into my nonprofit.

I survived 1975–1982 only by the grace of God. There is a funny story of a mushroom trip as Baptist Deacons arrive unannounced, and then a less humorous one when I am arrested a few months later. I sober up when my Mom finds a drug abuse program where I meet and marry a beautiful woman. In college I have an affair with a married man and finally “come out.” My wife’s kindness in the situation was a gift from God.

Because I am a Gay Christian I had to do something to help my dying friends. I explain my motivations for becoming an activist. I describe a lawsuit I won and my lengthy relationship with a promiscuous pathological liar that left me hopeless as a result of staying with him too long. I document the goals of my nonprofit and efforts to accomplish them. I discuss the power of music, the Politics of AIDS and address the success of our TV show. Three essays and selective song lyrics from the period 1993-1997 portray exactly what was occurring and how I was trying to help.

I honor deceased friends and forces that brought us to this place in history. I address the necessity to embrace forgiveness as we move forward. Details of my Mother’s journey are described: from a hard-core Baptist to her conversion to understand, accept and love me more than a religion. I never quote the Bible. In my “Book of Givens” I express beliefs based upon my experiences. I tell of my marriage performed by a Christian Minister in 2015, and the love I now share with my husband. It is my hope that others may benefit from my experiences.
 
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